Tuesday, 3 May 2016

THE MEANING OF "8"



I was playing "numbers" with a couple of eleven year old kids. I wrote the number 8 in large type and held it up.
"What is this? "
"Eight!" - in chorus.
"What does it mean?"
Coy smiles... the surely-you-know-what-it-means or Ahhh-this-sounds-like-a-trick-question variety.
I persisted.
"Where do you find it?"
"In school in Maths we use it!"

There is nothing quite like an innocent kid to amuse you in the purest and simplest way.

I interpret the last response to denote "institutionalization" or a symptom of the state of our gravely diseased education system. The equations are set.
EIGHT=Maths class
HYDROCHLORIC ACID=Chemistry exam
PACIFIC OCEAN=Geography homework
Etc.
Life proceeds on its track while education charts its own a fair distance away, making sure it never crosses life's path.

I persisted further.
"From the time you wake up in the morning until you go to bed, where might you use it or find it?"
One of the kids traces his finger on the table in the shape of 8 and says shyly "When we run in  circles like this?". Brilliant!  Now this kid was headed away from the lunacy of education. Not quite in the direction I "wanted" him to go but this was progress.

A couple of leading questions later we had the desired outpouring...
I have eight friends
I want eight chocolates

This morning there were  eight parrots on that tree (kid points to a tree some distance away which does house parrots at this time of the year. We were getting warm...
The examples kept flowing.

At one point I said "So I think we know what 8 means?  It is not just something we use in school, right?" Vigorous nods followed.

"So we know things like 8 parrots and eight chocolates. Now how about 8 waters? 8 milks? Does that mean anything to you?"
I could see them confused (henceforth we will recognize the acronym CITICFE to stand for Confusion Is The Ideal Catalyst For Enlightenment). A few CITICFE moments followed, judging by their expressions. Then one of them erupted...
एऽऽऽ ते litre असतंऽऽऽ! (Ayyऽऽऽ that's litres!!")
So then we chatted about how not all things can be just "8". Some have to be 8 something like 8 litres."
"Do you know any other such things?"
Prompt responses from both kids..."Kilos, centimetres" accompanied by broad grins. Hey who doesn't like success?

"So did you enjoy 8?"
"Yes!!!" - smiles all around.
"See this way you can enjoy all other numbers also on your own?"

At this point I gave them a break saying “After some time let us try to understand what 3/5 means.”  We followed it up with the meaning of 3/5.  I will post the 3/5 story later.

Tuesday, 12 April 2016

IN SEARCH OF A SCHOOL



A geriatric gentleman very close to me has a heart ailment.  He often suffers from bouts of breathlessness.  Medical intervention is in progress.  As part of the treatment it was suggested that “he be given oxygen”.  Accordingly refillable “oxygen” cylinders were purchased from a pharmacy.  Each would last forty minutes.  Hence from a convenience point of view an “oxygen machine” has been rented.  It works on electricity and supposedly releases oxygen through a mask that the patient wears.

I was intrigued by the small cylinders and the “oxygen machine”.  The machine is fairly large in size being a box two feet wide, two feet deep and three feet high.  The deposit on the machine is Rs. 5000/-and the weekly rent is Rs. 1000/-.  The cost of renting the machine set me thinking.  I found it puzzling that so precious a thing as oxygen would cost so little.  So I wore the mask to see what it felt like.  I wanted to experience what a gush of pure oxygen entering my nostrils would feel like.  I felt nothing.  At the same time it was obvious that the machine was emitting a gas through the pipe connected to the mask.  Just prior to the pipe is a small bottle containing water (I assume) through which one can see a gas escaping into the pipe.

So I was still left with the question – how is it possible to get a virtually interminable supply of pure oxygen, one of the most essential elements of life, so cheaply.  And that too using a machine which seemed fairly nondescript.  And how come I was not left feeling  distinctly oxygenated after inhaling pure oxygen?

So I Google’d “separating oxygen from air”.  Sure enough, I found sufficient evidence to be sure that the machine was not really emitting oxygen.  Think of it – does it seem obvious to anyone that a simple machine can simply “reach” into air around it and “extract” oxygen?  The What I learnt was that to separate the individual gases in air, the air is first solidified by cooling well below  ice-age levels.  Maybe to something like Minus 200 OC.

[Boiling point of oxygen = Minus 183 OC. Melting point of oxygen = Minus 210 OC.
Boiling point of nitrogen =Minus 196 OC.  Melting point of oxygen = Minus 219 OC]

Let us assume that air contains oxygen and nitrogen only (in any case these two makes most of air).  So the idea is, cool down air until it solidifies.  That is around Minus 220 OC.  So imagine that the air around us went that cold.  Then the air around us and in our lungs would be solid.  And we would be frozen equivalents of Madame Tussaud’s artistic creations.

Then start warming the solid air.  Warm it up to Minus 183 OC and stay there.  Oxygen would boil over and start escaping as a gas.  Now send it through the tube of the Rs. 1000/- a week machine into the mask and voila! – you are inhaling oxygen!  One look at the described machine and you know that is not what it can do.  For that, it would at least have to be your regular fridge which has a compressor which  I instinctively knew this machine did not.  And if this machine were a super-refrigerator, it would have to emit hot air like a fridge or an AC which it did not.  Not to mention the fact that the Google’d information spoke about “cryogenic distillation” to separate oxygen from air.  Whoa! – that’s rocket science – I have heard of “cryogenic rocket engine” and this Rs. 1000/- box was not it.  “Hah!” – I said to the gentleman’s daughter – “this ain’t an oxygen machine and the gas going into his nostrils ain’t oxygen!”.  (Didn’t go down well with the daughter at all!)

So I threw this one at my son who just got out of a year’s grinding study of high school Chemistry (which he thoroughly despised).  Well guess what … my conclusion seemed fairly obvious to him.  So I asked him if the machine does not cryogenically distill out oxygen, what the hell does it do?  We concluded after some debate that maybe it just increases the percentage of oxygen in the air by reducing the amount of nitrogen.  Great, sounds plausible.  But how does it distill out nitrogen without the cryogenic stuff?  So my son said there are metals which “adsorb” nitrogen.  I didn’t Google that one, I just went with the assumption that no matter how much he had hated Chemistry, something must have stuck.  So we said fine let’s go with the theory that it has a metal element which “adsorbs” nitrogen.  And maybe as part of servicing the machine that “nitrogen filter” is probably replaced because it got too “adsorbed” in nitrogen.  Like what happens to an Aquaguard filter, so very very plausible .

But yet a doubt lingers – how come now suddenly a simple alternative was found to the cryogenic mumbo jumbo?  So I decided to try and get a bit intuitive.  Most of air is nitrogen.  Is that the reason it is possible to “pick it out”?  Let’s say the floor of a room is littered with tennis balls – 3000 red ones, 200  blue ones and 50 white ones.  The game is to pick as many of them as possible in 15 seconds.  Just one condition – you must pick balls of the same colour.  Obviously the red ones are the easiest to pick.  Maybe that is why nitrogen is the easiest to pick by adsorption?  It sounds intuitive to me.

The air coming out of the machine also passes through water as mentioned earlier, so it is reasonable to assume that dust gets caught in the water and cleaner air passes on to the patient’s nostrils.
So I conclude fairly confidently (this does not mean I am right but I did come up with what seems like a very logical theory)
(1) The gas let out in the mask is not oxygen
(2)It is air richer in oxygen that the air surrounding us
(3)It is cleaner than the air surrounding us

In other words, the machine dispenses air that is probably the equivalent quality as clean mountain air.  So can I say that the machine would be of no use in clean and pristine surroundings?  Possibly.

Then comes the next thought -  If it requires “cryo science” to extract oxygen from air, how come our body does it so effortlessly?  Surely there is no cryogenic engine inside us?  Now this one I was able to figure out in a jiffy.  The obvious thing to do would be to mouth platitudes along the lines of “The human body…a miracle of nature…etc. etc. and very soon reach God and his greatness”.  But let’s not use God as a cupboard to shove in everything we can’t explain.  The Church, Temple & Mosque have been fighting that losing battle for a long time.  When a fire burns it consumes oxygen but there is no cryogenic distillation going on.  So how does it happen?  That means oxygen gets attracted to the fire, extracts itself from air and helps the fire burn.  That’s a chemical reaction.  The intuitive way of looking at it is – you need to create conditions that prompt oxygen to extract itself from air and throw itself into a reaction.  However do note that at the end of such a reaction oxygen did not remain itself, but got converted into something – ash or coal etc.  So when you breathe air, the act of producing energy that your body continuously performs, attracts oxygen, combustion takes place and you are able to do what you are doing – run, jump, walk or just exist.

So you can attract oxygen from air and entice it into burning itself towards an end.  But to extract it from air and preserve it as oxygen takes special effort.

So what was the point of this seemingly pointless discourse?  The point was my realization that I could have figured this all out when I was in school without reading the text book or attending classes – nothing I learnt as part of “higher education” was needed to figure it out. But I did not figure out such things in school.  In school I would have practiced drawing a diagram of the machine, labelling its parts and describing how it gave out oxygen to save the lives of sick people (FILL IN THE BLANKS – The machine which is used to produce oxygen for breathing by sick people is called ________).  The class I was in would have never seen the machine and definitely would not have spent a few hours doubting its capabilities and figuring out what is really does.  But somewhere some place there must be a school where students do it.  I wonder where it is.  Because most definitely none of the folks I spend time with – at home or at work went to such a school.

Saturday, 2 April 2016

बकासुराची आराधना

शालेय जीवनात मी सातत्याने ९०% गुण घरी घेऊन येत असे. पुढे आमच्या मुलाने तीच प्रथा पाळली. त्यानंतर आमच्या कन्यारत्नाने शालेय जीवनात पदार्पण केले. काही काळातच उघड झाले की "नव्वदकरां"च्यात एक "पंचावन्नकर" सामील झाले आहेत.

पाठांतर न करणे, घाणेरडे अक्षर काढणे, अजिबात अभ्यासाला न बसणे, गृहपाठ करायला विसरणे (बऱ्याचवेळा हेतुपुरस्सर), शाळेसाठी वेळेवर न उठणे, परीक्षेबद्दल बेफिकिरी असे typical प्रतिनव्वदकर गुण व पंचावन्नकर लक्षणे नित्याने समोर येऊ लागली. आता आमच्या घरात दोन परिवार नांदतात - नव्वदकर आणि पंचावन्नकर.

गेली तीन वर्षे मी आमच्या पंचावन्नकरांचा "अभ्यास घेण्या"बाबतीत अनेक सत्याचे प्रयोग केले आहेत. ह्यातून एका ठाम निष्कर्षास पोचलो - आपली शालेय व परीक्षा पद्धती म्हणजे एक हिंस्त्र बकासुर आहे. ह्या बकासुराला एकच खाद्य चालते - Marks उर्फ गुण उर्फ percentage उर्फ टक्केवारी. इथे एक नमूद करावेसे वाटते की SSC, ICSE, CBSE तीनही अभ्यासक्रमांची ही गत आहे - काही ICSE/CBSE  पालकांचा असा गोड गैरसमज असतो की ह्या शालेय पद्धती म्हणजे बकासुर नसून Mother Teresa आहेत (खरंतर मी साने गुरुजी म्हणणार होतो पण त्याने ICSE पालकांना मेल्याहुनही मेल्यासारखे वाटले असते). हा धादान्त भाबडेपणा असून उलट ह्या बाकासुरांचे जबडे अधिक रुंद आहेत, त्यांचे दात अधिक तीक्ष्ण आहेत आणि त्यांना SSCच्या बकासुराच्या तिप्पट खाईखाई सुटलेली आहे. असो.

गेल्या वर्षी मी आमच्या मुलाला घेऊन TIFR मधील एका विख्यात शास्त्रज्ञांना "मार्गदर्शना"साठी भेटायला गेलो. त्यांना भारत सरकारने शांतीस्वरूप भटनागर पुरस्कार प्रदान केला आहे. हा पुरस्कार म्हणजे भारताचे नोबेल पारितोषिक असे म्हटल्यास वावगे ठरणार नाही.  म्हणजे लक्षात घ्या की माझी त्यांच्याशी ओळख नाही.  कोणीतरी त्यांचा नंबर दिला, मी फोन केला, ते म्हणाले या,आम्ही गेलो, ते भेटले, गप्पा झाल्या - that easy!

गप्पांच्या ओघात शास्त्रज्ञसाहेब  म्हणाले, "Schools and colleges want marks from you.  So you should study enough to get marks and then tell them - Look, I have given you marks, now please leave me alone".  प्रचलीत शाळा आणि महाविद्यालय पद्धतीच्या बकासुराच्या इतक्या सुसंकृतपणे थोबाडीत त्यांनी लगावली असे अतीव दुःखाने म्हणावे लागते.  ह्याच बकासुराला मी आणि माझा मुलगा नियमीतपणे खाऊ घालत आलोत.  आमच्यामुळे व आमच्यासारख्यांनी त्याला माजवून ठेवले आहे असे खेदाने नमूद करावेसे वाटते. 

थोडक्यात विद्यमान शाळा आणि महाविद्यालये ही विद्यादान तर सोडाच, कुठल्याच प्रकारचे दान करत नसून निव्वळ मार्कांची वसुली करत आहेत असा उघड अर्थ निघतो.  ह्या गुणदानाच्या  कार्यात निपुण असलेल्या आम्हा नव्वदकरांचे तसेही "भले" होत असते.  परंतु त्याचसोबत ह्या बकासुराला मार्कांची आहुती देताना ज्यांचा हात आखडत असतो त्या पंचावन्नकर विद्यार्थ्यांचे कौतुक करायलाही हरकत नाही.  आजची जीवघेणी शिक्षण पद्धती जर बदलणार असेल तर त्या बदलाचे catalyst हे पंचावन्नकर असतील.  नव्वदकर मात्र नकळतपणे त्या बदलाचा विरोध करत असतात.

आता माझ्या सत्याच्या प्रयोगांकडे वळतो...

2+3 = 5.  10-3=7.  इथवर ठीक आहे.  सर्वसाधारण पंचावन्नकर इथवर सहज पोचतो. का?  तर "माझ्याकडे २ chocolate होती आईने अजून ३ दिली" - खरी chocolate देऊन समजावता येते.  पुढे 24 + 78 आले की थोडा घाम फुटतो पण मारून मुटकून वेळ मारून नेता येते.  पण त्यानंतर 6 - 12 = minus 6 चे काय?  तेव्हा इथे थोडा विचार करून "loan" ही कल्पना आमच्या पंचावन्नकरांना समजावली.  "Negative number म्हणजे खिशाला पडलेले भोक, त्यात chocolate टाकले की भोक बुजते पण chocolate गायब होते, मात्र आता next मिळेल ते chocolate खिशात सुरक्षित राहील" इथपासून ते chocolate चे आपल्यावर कर्ज असणे, कर्ज असल्यास chocolate ची आवक झाल्यावर काय होते इत्यादी इत्यादी करून पंचावन्नकरांना 23 - 100 = Minus 77 हे गणित जमू लागले.  आता 17a - 14b - 8a + 3b करताना आठवण करून द्यावी लागते - "नीट बघ, story काय आहे?".  मग पंचावन्नकर म्हणतात "OK ok आपल्याला already 14 chocolates द्यायची होती पण आपल्याला 3 chocolate मिळाले त्यामुळे आता ... (अं अं ... rough work ... हंssss ... Minus 11!).  गम्मत अशी आहे की पंचावन्नकरांना गणिते जमतात परंतु प्रत्येक गणितामागे तीन ते चार stories असतात, त्या स्वतःला सांगत गणिते करायची तर परीक्षेचा वेळ अपुरा पडतो.  नव्वदकर मात्र धडाधड method वापरून गणितांचा मसाला कुटून चविष्ठ स्वयंपाक करत असतात आणि बकासुराला खाऊ घालत असतात.  त्यांच्यापैकी (आमच्यापैकी) बहुतेकांना ह्या numbers च्या मागे एक theory आहे, त्याला Number Theory म्हणतात आणि त्यावर आपले ब्रम्हांड रचले आहे ह्याचा गंधही नसतो.  तो गंध पंचावन्नकरालाही नसतो.  मग प्रश्न पडतो की नव्वदकर आणि पंचावन्नकर ह्यांच्यात अधिक सुशिक्षीत कोण? का दोघेही तितकेच अशिक्षित?

SSC इयत्ता सहावीच्या इतिहासाच्या पुस्तकात एक धडा आहे - Ancient KIngdoms of the North.  त्यातील काही शब्द आणि वाक्प्रचार पुढीलप्रमाणे आहेत - Brihadratha, assimilated, flourished, Samudragupta, neighbouring, inscription, Harshavardhan, munificence.  ज्या IT कंपनीत मी नोकरी करतो तिथले पन्नास टक्के कर्मचारी ह्या spelling परीक्षेत पंचावन्नकर ठरतील.  म्हणजे तत्वतः पंचावन्नकर कदाचित IT engineer बनू शकतो पण त्यास बकासुर आडवा येतो.  Brihadratha आणि Harshavardhan - आमचे पंचावन्नकर काहीकेल्या "Brihadratha" लक्षात ठेवू शकत नाहीत परंतु "Harshavardhan" - no problem!  असे का?  तर हर्षवर्धन नावाचा एक अतिशय गोड पण भयंकर वात्रट पोरगा तिचा societyत मित्र आहे.  आता जिथे आपणच "अनुष्का, तनिष्का, राहुल, सोहम शायना" अशी "गोंडस" नावे आपल्या मुलांना देतो तिथे ही जुनी अवजड नावे लक्षात ठेवायची अपेक्षा का करतो?  बरे, अपेक्षा ठेवा - शेवटी तो आपला इतिहास आहे.  परंतु "अशी नावे लक्षात न ठेवणाऱ्या विद्यार्थ्याला डॉक्टरकी करू देणार नाही" हा मूर्खपणा कशासाठी?  ते मूल इतिहास संशोधक होण्याचा तसाही प्रयत्न करणार नाही!

"Dhanananda was a greedy and oppressive king" अशी व इतर अनेक वाक्ये पाठ कर आणि पेपरात लिही असे पंचावन्नकरास सांगणे म्हणजे माझ्यासारख्याला "सलमान खानच्या अमुक चित्रपटातील तमुक danceच्या steps शीक आणि पुढील सहनिवासाच्या वार्षिक स्नेहसंमेलनात स्टेजवर करून दाखव" असे म्हणण्यासारखे आहे.  म्हणून आता मी मुलीला सरळ सांगतो की परीक्षेत लिही "Dhanananda was a bad king.  He troubled his people." आणि घे मिळतील तितके मार्क आणि घाल बकासुराच्या नरड्यात.  खरंतर मी तिला Samudragupta ऐवेजी "Sea-secret" लिहायला सांगणार होतो, पण एवढी बंडखोरी लहान मुलावर लादणे बरे नाही म्हणून थांबलो.

बकासुराचे अनेक agent आहेत परंतु ह्या agent समाजातील सर्वात सक्रीय आणि हेकेखोर गट म्हणजे पालक (आणि त्यातही आयांचेspecialization अतिशय उच्च दर्जाचे आहे).  मी एकदा मुलीच्या शाळेत परीक्षेचे पेपर पाहण्याच्या कार्यक्रमाला दबकत गेलो होतो. शेवटी ठरवलं काही नाही मनातले सरळ class teacherना सांगायचे.  माझी पाळी आली तेव्हा त्यांच्या समोर जाऊन बसलो आणि त्यांनी पंचावन्नकरांची तक्रार करण्यापूर्वी मीच म्हणालो "आम्हाला माहित आहे आमची मुलगी अभ्यास करत नाही तिला ५०% टक्के मिळतात.  We are fine with that. तुम्ही उगीच वाईट वाटून घेऊ नका आणि tension घेऊ नका" - हुश्श!!! सागून टाकले एकदाचे!  बाईंचा चेहरा क्षणभर "हा कोण वेडा आला स्वतःला पालक म्हणवत" असा काहीसा झाला.  कारण त्याआधी त्यांच्या समोर बसलेली एक आई म्हणजे "मुलाचे मार्क वाढवायला काय करू" ह्या चर्चेत केवळ "Brain surgery चांगली कुठे होते - जास्लोकला का हिंदुजाला" असे विचारायची बाकी होती.  पण बाई लगेच सावरल्या आणि हसून OK ok as she grows older she will study असा दिलासा त्यांनी दिला.इथे एक गोष्टं नमूद केली पाहिजे की मुलाच्या आणि मुलीच्या शाळेत असे अनेक शिक्षक भटले ज्यांच्या डोळ्यात असा भाव दिसतो की "अरे कशाला उरावर बसता पोरांच्या, मजेत वाढू दे की त्यांना!' परंतु त्यांना पालकांची भीती वाटते. कारण त्यांनी असे म्हटल्यास अनेक पालक "Management"ला जाऊन खडसावतील की "पुढील आयुष्यात आर्थिक यश guarantee करण्याचे steroids मारायला तुमच्या clinic मध्ये आम्ही मुले पाठवतो आणि तुम्ही हे homeopathy/आयुर्वेदाचे तोतये डॉक्टर शिक्षक म्हणून बसवता? तक्रार करू का शिक्षण खात्याकडे?"

SSC इयत्ता सहावी Scienceमध्ये MOTION हा धडा आहे.  त्यात Random motion, Periodic motion, Circular motion, Oscillatory motion यांच्या व्याख्या पाठ करणे क्रमप्राप्त ठरते नाहीतर "बकासुर food" मिळत नाही.  थेट Three Idiots चित्रपटाची आठवण होते.  एक तर Circular is also Periodic or Oscillatory is also Periodic हे पुस्तक तरी सांगत नाही.  घरी मी धावून, चालून, अंगविक्षेप करून दाखवल्यावर पंचावन्नकरांना अभ्यासात इंटरेस्ट वाटला.  त्यांनीही सगळे motions करून दाखवले.  काही तरी उपयोग झाला असेल नाही?  चंद्र पृथ्वीभोवती का फिरतो? - हे एक दोरखंड घेऊन सहज घरात समजावता येते. पण हे व्याप करायला ना  शिक्षकास वेळ मिळतो ना पालकांना.  ह्याच धड्यात "Speed" या कल्पेनेचे introduction आहे.  पण भर कशावर तर Speedचे definition पाठ करण्यावर ... SPEED IS THE DISTANCE TRAVELLED IN UNIT TIME.  किती अगम्य भाषा आहे ही सहावीतल्या पंचावन्नकरासाठी!  हेच जेव्हा मी तिला खाली घेऊन गेलो आणि buildingला आलटून पालटून आम्ही दोघांनी चालत धावत round मारल्या आणि mobileवर वेळ मोजून वहीत तख्ता बनवला तेव्हा कुठे Distance travelled in 1 minute, Distance travelled in 1 second, Distance travelled in 1 hour ह्या संकल्पनांना हात घातला गेला. त्याच वेळी कुठल्या तरी घरात एखादा नव्वदकर असल्या दहा व्याख्या पाठ करून दहा मार्क खिशात घालत होता.  घालो बापडा - त्यात काही गैर नाही.  आणि पाठांतर व संस्मरण यांना निश्चित किंमत आहे. परंतु ह्या सगळ्या प्रकारात चाचणीचा एकच निकष (बकासुराचे समाधान) असल्यामुळे पाठन्तारातील पंचावन्नकरावर "सरसकट पंचावन्नकर" असा ठपका लागतो.  ह्यातून मार्ग काय? सरळ सरळ मुलांना सांगायचे - लिही ... Speed means running fast or slow.  If I run faster than Anushka I have more speed.  But she always has more speed.  Next time I will have more speed than her.  तसेही शिक्षकाला तपासणी साठी वेळ असतो किती?  Engineeringला माझा एक मित्र होता.  तो सांगायचा की एका third semesterच्या पेपरला त्याने अजिबात अभ्यास केला नव्हता आणि म्हणे सगळे प्रश्न तीनदा उतरवून काढले (त्याचे हस्ताक्षर अप्रतीम होते) तर म्हणे PASS झाला !!!  खरं खोटं माहित नाही but I would not be surprised if it is true.

परीक्षेच्या सीझन मध्ये सकाळी पत्नीसोबत चहा घेत असलो की तिच्या Whatsapp ग्रुपवर आयांचे धडाधड मेसेज येतात - "Aga konala yacha answer mahit ahe ka - GIVE REASONS: Population density in South Asia is very high".  ही आज सकाळची ताजी कथा आहे.  आत आमची मुलगी परीक्षेला जाण्यासाठी तयार होताहोता तिच्या पाळीव मांजरीशी खेळत होती. मी स्वतःशी हसलो आणि म्हणालो - "चालले आमचे पंचावन्नकर वीर ... बकासुर अराधकांच्या बालयोध्यांशी compete करायला!.  भीम तिचे बापडीचे रक्षण करो!"

- एक पंचावन्नकर बाप, पूर्वाश्रमीचा बकासुर आराधक नव्वदकर विद्यार्थी.




Wednesday, 2 March 2016

ASK WHAT THE COUNTRY CAN DO FOR YOU



On 1st March 2016 I saw the honourable Finance Minister of India sitting on a bench in Lodi Garden.  He had a twig in his hands from which he was gently plucking tiny leaves and from a distance I thought he was muttering “She loves me, she loves me not”.   He had a partially lovelorn look on his face.  Out of concern for the economy, I went close to him and realized that he was actually repeatedly muttering “We will tax PF, we won’t tax PF, we might tax only the interest, we surely won’t tax PPF …”.

The 2016-2017 annual budget was announced with the usual fanfare.  On that day a co-worker mentioned at the lunch table that the government was introducing a tax on Provident Fund.  I told him I did not see anything to that effect on the budget headlines on the internet.  Nor did we see anything on the TV in the cafeteria.  The topic ended there.

The next day the newspapers reported the government’s intention to start taxing EPF (Employee Provident Fund). The reactions started pouring in.  Whatsapp groups started buzzing early in the morning.  A sample of media reports that poured in during the two days  is reproduced below.

“EPF: A googly that could stump the salaried class”
-       Now, 60 per cent of savings under the Employees’ Provident Fund will be taxed at the time of withdrawal
thehindu.com, 1st March 2016
“EPF tax in Budget 2016: Centre rushes to clarify, says PPF tax exempt, but EPF to be taxed on withdrawal, aam aadmi worried”
financialexpress.com, 2nd March 2016
"Final stand on taxing EPF during Budget debate: Arun Jaitley"
Times Of India, internet edition, 2nd March 2016
“Budget 2016: Calm down folks! Tax on EPF withdrawal may not be all that bad, say experts”
firstpost.com, 2nd March 2016
“Under fire from board, government looks to sugarcoat EPF tax”
indianexpress.com, 2nd March 2016
“"Budget 2016: Why government is wrong in taxing EPF"”
“Budget 2016: Provident Fund to be taxed, unions warn stir”
indianexpress.com, 2nd March 2016

The above headlines paint the Finance Minister in a rather poor light.  It is possible that the ministry did not give the proposal enough thought.  That would mean they are casual and incompetent.  It is possible that they are testing the waters.  That would cast a shadow over their awareness – we elected you to govern us, can’t you at least try to be sure about what we want – couldn’t you have judged this before reading out the budget?  Worse still, they might have proposed something utterly atrocious (“corpus and interest to be taxed”) believing that the subsequent magnanimity (“only interest will be taxed”) would result in a negotiation deftly secured. That would make them shameless and unscrupulous in my book.  Whichever way one looks at it, the Finance Ministry does not come out too well.

On 2nd March 2016 The Indian Express editorial dealt with the issue very maturely  – “The PF Storm - The government must present a more convincing case for doing away with tax exemption on EPF corpus withdrawals” (http://indianexpress.com/article/opinion/editorials/the-pf-storm/).  The editorial brought home the simple fact that we get taxed when we earn.  If one can accept that simple fact as one ought to accept the reality of death, then one concludes that yes, the PF interest must get taxed.

Why is it then that most of us felt outraged at the PF tax proposal.  Here’s a litany of probable reasons.

Since the day I started working (13th January 1987), an unwritten rule was handed out – this is a pension-less world, you need to set up your own retirement.  PF, PPF et al were the most prevalent ways to do that, and that is what most of us have been doing.  We based our calculations on that (at least those of us who are boring enough to calculate). Now after thirty years of careful accumulation if you tell us that in the last few overs of the game the government has decided to reduce the size of your bat, but the target remains the same – then how fair is that?  And honestly, we all know the target is ever increasing in this country thanks to inflation. You want to create a pensioned society? - start with the baby boomers who still have thirty years of employment ahead, take them into confidence and take them towards a pensioned retirement.

You want to tax our Provident Funds, yet you allow a tycoon who defrauded employees of mandatory employer contributions to strut around freely in spite of a court having issued a non-bailable warrant against him?  I am not scared of naming the fella, I just find it disgusting to even utter his name.  Not to mention the fact that the willful defaulter owes God knows many hundreds of crores to public sector banks, who you will now recapitalize by applying a haircut to health services, education and other services you owe us in exchange for taxes.

You are very diligent when it comes to collecting tax from us.  But then why the lethargy in the matter of curbing tax evasion?  Show me one strong measure in the budget that will attempt to stop the tax evasion.  Google “tax evasion statistics in india” and you will find a long list of resources available in the public domain which try to estimate the magnitude of tax evasion in India.  The book “The Black Economy in India” by Arun Kumar claims the extent to be 14 trillion rupees i.e. 14 lakh crore rupees annually.

Justice Arun Chaudhari of the Nagpur bench of the Bombay High Court recently while passing an order called on citizens to raise voice against "this menace" (corruption) and "refuse to pay taxes by launching a non-cooperation movement" if the government fails to control it.  Ironically this “anti-national” statement was made from the very city which today is the capital of India’s new-found, redefined nationalism.

The Constitution embodies a plethora of contracts between the state and the citizen.  The state and the citizen transact continuously to execute those contracts.  I had read somewhere that “A business transaction in which one of the involved parties is designed to continuously lose is a fraud.”  The Indian citizen’s “I pay tax you provide services” contract with the state has turned into the sort of business transaction which is effectively a fraud perpetrated on the citizen by the state.  I sincerely hope that was seditious enough, though the word “effectively” in lieu of “willfully” was intended to take the poison out of the sedition sting.

The time has come in this country for citizens to turn John Fitzgerald Kennedy’s immortal quote on its head and with minor modifications say, “Ask not what you can do for the state, but what the state can do for you”.  If this renders me unpatriotic or whatever is the nationalistic epithet of the season, to hell with it.  Come get me.